There’s no harm in the occasional white lie, is there?
Probably not. But us Irish folk are prone to lying slightly more than what could be deemed ‘occasional.’
The worse thing is that most of these lies are told to ourselves.
Here’s 10 of the most common ones us JOEs tend to tell ourselves.
I’m only going to have one
From pints to biscuits, this is one lie us Irish people are the most fond of telling ourselves.
You think you’re only going to have one and you say you’re only going to have one.
Then suddenly, out of nowhere, it’s 3am and the full packet of Mikado are gone.
Telling ourselves our partner was honest when she said she didn’t want anything for her birthday
This is when two lies come together to cause the perfect storm. She said she didn’t want anything (lie number 1). You lied to yourself by believing her (lie number 2).
Funnily enough, it’s your lie that gets punished… How’s the doghouse looking these days?
We weren’t flirting, we were only chatting
You should probably redecorate that doghouse, because you’re destined to spend a fair amount of your time in there if you believe that flirting with the opposite sex is merely ‘chatting’.
Maybe it was just ‘chatting’, but then you had to spoil it all by saying something stupid like…
I’m only going to buy this one item of clothing
Your new wardrobe looks great and all, but your next pay-day is 28 days away. At least you’ll be fashionable when asking for a loan.
Going to the gym on a regular basis
You will in your ar*e.
You’ll probably go on a regular basis the week you purchase the membership.
I’ll DEFINITELY read this highbrow book I bought
Well you did read the first page. The movie version is bound to be much simpler anyway. 
One more episode and I’ll go to bed
It’s clearly not the last episode you’ll watch, so we don’t know who you think you’re fooling. Let us know what happens during the season finale, will you?
I’ll start jogging/swimming when the weather improves
Repeat after me: “I LIVE IN IRELAND, ALL THE SEASONS ARE THE SAME. I LIVE IN IRELAND, ALL THE SEASONS ARE THE SAME.”
I WILL get off Facebook and go to sleep
Do you want to know what time-travel feels like? Go on Facebook ten minutes before you plan to go to bed. Somehow, you will magically transport two hours into the future and have no idea where the time went.
This is the last time I’m going to press the snooze button
We’ve all been there.
You’re wrecked tired; it’s time to get up out of bed; you press the snooze button on the alarm clock.
Ten minutes later, you repeat the process. Ten minutes later, your repeat the process again. And AGAIN.
So there you have it, 10 lies we all tell ourselves. So don’t worry, you’re not the only one…
Brought to you by Four Star Pizza – Honest Pizza.
LISTEN: You Must Be Jokin’ podcast – listen to the latest episode now!
