We’ve been through all of these.
When it comes to breaking up with your partner, we’re fairly sure that every Irish mam has uttered these famous words, “if it’s meant for you then it won’t pass you by”.
While this is true, there are usually a few solid reasons as to why most couples break up.
We tend to do romantic strife a little bit differently here in Ireland.
Take a look at the list below and let us know if there are any that you would add.
1) No romance in school
“Sorry I have to break it off with you. The Junior Cert is just too important for my ultimate plans to be the Mayor of Carlow”.
No more kissing behind the bike shed in school then.
2) Your folks know best
“Sorry but my mam told me that I can’t spend any time with you. They need me around the house to take care of the dog”.
3) The dreaded parish
If you’ve lived in a small town then you’ll know that rumours can spread quickly.
There’s nothing worse than being accused of acting the maggot when you were actually well behaved.
I tell you, all those 9,732 people are out to get me with their lies.
Yeah, that’s right, their “lies”.
*Cough, cough*
4) You shifted their mate
Ever hooked up with someone only to realise that you were with their friend before?
It never ends well.
5) Heading abroad
“You’re a great person, but I want to be single on my J1 so… yeah…”
It’s almost like these people think that they’re Ryan Gosling/Jennifer Lawrence and will instantly pull anyone that they see in the US.
Good luck with that ya fecker.
6) Mountains from molehills
All guys and girls are guilty of blowing things out of proportion at times, but there are some people that have this art perfected to a tee.
“I sent you 13 texts in 27 minutes last night? What were you doing?”
FYI, the correct answer is any of these: 1) out with your friends 2) sleeping 3) mass or 4) deliberately didn’t reply because you’re an absolute head-melting freakazoid that threatens to spill molten-hot crazy over me.
7) The sporting divide
Do you support a different club, team or county to the one that your partner follows?
It’s always interesting when the two teams face-off. Here’s hoping the relationship survives.
8) Tinder logic
“My friend’s, cousin’s, little sister’s neighbour said that she saw you on Tinder. Explain?!?!”.
Remember people, Ireland is small and your town is even smaller.
9) Making poor tea
This is our own strange gripe, but anyone that makes weak tea or adds too much milk has a battle on their hands to win us over.
Is there anyone else that’s like us? Anyone?
10) All the classics
Cheating, lying, creeping, arguing, farting and more.
LISTEN: You Must Be Jokin’ podcast – listen to the latest episode now!
