How many of these people have you seen?
It’s the weekend which means that a few house parties or late night sessions will be taking place all over Ireland.
With thanks to Desperados, we’ve put together a list of all the folks you’re likely to meet at these excellent shindigs.
iPod DJ
Ugh, these people are the very worst because they’re never happy with what’s being played.
It doesn’t matter what tunes are on because according to them, ‘It’s all about this upcoming Senegalese crunkcore band that everyone MUST have on their iPod, unless they’re a musical moron’.
You’ve permission to kick these people up the arse if you ever meet them.
Wreck it Ralph
Do you have a friend that means well but they just have this magical ability to smash the living s**t out of anything that’s near them? Introducing, Wreck it Ralph…
The room could be totally empty but this friend of yours would still manage to set the curtains on fire, break a lamp and let off an ungodly fart. All in the space of three minutes.
Guitar wan*er
It’s Saturday night for feck’s sake, no one wants to hear your rendition of Wonderwall or Wish You Were Here at 11pm.
‘Overly enthusiastic’ Eoghan
Have you ever been to a party and felt like you were being interrogated by a complete stranger during a conversation?
‘Hi, how are you? Who do you know here? What do you do? Have you been here long? Do you own those trousers?’ etc.
Our advice to these people? Chill out.
The trout of no craic
There’s always someone that looks like their goldfish has just been murdered and the most recent episode of Game of Thrones has been spoiled for them.
The Kitchen club
Any house party will see clicks and groups forming because a bunch of friends will usually treat strangers with this sort of look.
This being said, there are certain people that always spend the entire night in the kitchen and refuse to move. We reckon that they’re raiding the fridge while no one else is looking.
John and Mary
You’re bound to see a couple arguing at an Irish house party. It’s not like this warring couple are making everyone else in the vicinity feel really awkward and uncomfortable.
Lets just agree that there’s no right and wrong in this little lovers tiff, they’re both equally annoying.
Billy no mates
Like that tin of beans that has been in your cupboard for years, no one knows how, when or why this person is at the party, nor do we want to know.
This guy usually claims to be a friend of a friend but they’re probably just some creep that wandered in off the street.
Cue a nonchalant exit after being ‘discovered’.
Toilet Queuer
I swear to god, there have been people that spend more time waiting for and using the bathroom than anything else.
Quagmire
You have to love those guys that basically see house parties as a form of speed dating.
These Lotharios just bounce around the room like a horny pinball that chats up anything in their sight.
‘Not leaving Liam’
These party animals are usually slumped on your couch and don’t have the energy nor the will to leave. Trust us, they would happily stay in your home until Wednesday if they could whilst eating your food and watching Netflix.
It’s not that bad though because these guys are usually your best friend, so this sort of behaviour is allowed.
This article was brought to you by Desperados, Ireland’s party starting tequila flavored beer, available nationwide! Want to join them for their next epic and absurd party or to win yourself a house party pack? Check out Facebook and Twitter now!
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