Nothing scary here, no sir.
Yes yes, it’s Halloween.
The best time of the year? Probably not, but it’s fun all the same.
Tricks, treats, enforced office dress-up ‘fun’ and punch that tastes like extra strong paint thinner; it’s all to play for.
And, but of course, there are a bunch of movies on TV this evening – some of them terrifying – to choose from…
The Witch – Film 4 – 9pm
A patient slow burn of a wicked thing, The Witch is a challenging horror that takes you back to 17th century New England, plants you in a tiny familial settlement and cranks up the tension.
One of the most divisive films of its kind of recent years, Robert Eggers’ directorial debut is all about atmosphere, bolstered by a stunning breakout performance from Anya Taylor-Joy.
Saw – ITV 4 – 9pm
Saw was a big deal when it arrived onto the scene in 2004.
A fresh new horror with a unique creation. And then, like all successful horror movies, they ran it into the ground year on year until the blood bubble burst.
Still, the first one remains charming in its own grisly way.
Deepwater Horizon – 4 Seven – 9.20pm
In case you missed the Mark Wahlberg/Kurt Russell oil rig disaster smackdown over the weekend, here’s another chance.
Best watched very loud when it all kicks off.
Fright Night – SyFy – 10.30pm
Not the original, the one with Colin Farrell in it. Has its moments.
Halloween H20 – W – 11pm
This one no longer exists in the brand new timeline, but it’s honestly one of the better Halloween offerings out there.
Sure, it feels 90s as hell and they picked a really poor Michael Myers mask for some reason, but the final act is an all-timer.
Poltergeist – ITV 4 – 11.10pm
Another remake. It’s got Sam Rockwell, though!
The Midnight Meat Train – Film 4 – 1.30am
Taking us into Tuesday is a mute and quite intense Vinny Jones in this messy adaptation of a Clive Barker short story.
Bradley Cooper plays a photographer who stumbles upon a very specific moving house of horrors that just might consume him before all is said and done.
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