Yes, the Champions League is on.
Yes, we will be watching it.
No, that won’t stop us from listing out a clutch of films on television this evening (Wednesday 1 May) for your non-football-related viewing pleasure.
Onwards.
On Her Majesty’s Secret Service – ITV4 – 8pm
George Lazenby’s one and only turn in the 007 tuxedo.
American Pie: The Wedding – ITV2 – 9pm
In which a bunch of hedonists come of age and get married and do grown-up life things.
Ghost in the Shell – 4Seven – 9pm
Scarlett Johansson proves a controversial casting choice in the finally-realised Hollywood crack at a beloved Japanese manga classic.
Max Payne – SyFy – 10pm
If you’re fascinated by how Hollywood continually gets video game adaptions wrong, Mark Wahlberg’s take on Max Payne is appointment viewing.
The Grand Budapest Hotel – Film 4 – 11.10pm
Thoughtful, adventurous, witty, and wildly colourful compendium of misfits, villains, and unlikely heroes from the mind of Wes Anderson.
He’s helped by a quite stunning cast in the form of Ralph Fiennes, Saoirse Ronan, Willem Dafoe, Jeff Goldblum, Adrien Brody, Tilda Swinton, Jude Law, Harvey Keitel, Bill Murray, Jason Schwartzman, Léa Seydoux, F. Murray Abraham, Owen Wilson and Tony Revolori.
Man on Fire – Film 4 – 1.10am
Denzel Washington doles out righteous revenge in Tony Scott’s pulpy kidnap thriller.
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