Guyliner, manscara, guylashes – what’s next? Male nail polish, apparently. Yes, you read that right. Nail polish. For men.
Make-up for men seems to have become a trend over the past few years. We genuinely have no idea why. Is there really a market for this stuff? And more importantly, have you ever stared longingly at your girlfriend’s red nails and just wished that you too could sport some colour on your fingertips? Our guess is no, but then again, you never know.
Alphanail.com is a new website that is just desperate to convince us that nail varnish for men – or nail ‘armor’ – is a good idea. It plays on the notion that only real ‘alpha males’ wear nail varnish. Seriously. Just check out this quote from their homepage:
“It is a statement… a proclamation of the inner attitude of the alpha. It is about having the confidence that says ‘I am my own man and will decide the rules for how I live my life according to how I see fit.”
Uh…yeah…
For the low, low price of $9.95, you can get your nail armor in a variety of metallic and dark shades. Alpha Nail is almost trying too hard to flog this stuff. In the hopes of brainwashing impressionable menfolk, they’ve even given the colours cool/manly/tough names such as ‘concrete,’ ‘smoke’ and ‘benjamins.’ Let’s just take a moment to consider this.
Picture the scene: you’re in the pub having a few pints and your friend walks in, nails smothered in ‘concrete’ nail polish. What’s your likely reaction? Do you congratulate him on his new alpha male status? Or laugh at him so much, you can’t actually breathe? Yeah, we thought so.
So, male nail polish – an abomination of masculinity? Or the latest way to show everyone you’re an alpha male?
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