Send a raven.
As ever, SPOILER ALERT! Here are some of our favourite moments from this week’s spectacular finale, ‘Mother’s Mercy’.
Master of Quotes – Best Line
And breathe. There’s so much to discuss, analyse and speculate about but don’t worry, we’re going to stick a sword straight into the stomach of this episode and dissect some of its key moments. Trust us, we know something.
Actions definitely spoke louder than words in the finale but we did take immense pleasure when Stannis heard that there’s something ‘worse than mutiny‘.
Within 5 minutes he learned that; half of his army was gone, the red priestess went A.W.O.L. and his wife committed suicide due to Shireen’s execution.
Tyrion’s wry remark to Jorah and Dario that ‘we always want the wrong woman‘ was a rare laugh in an episode that was darker than the bleakest depths of The Wall and it’s here where the most memorable words were fatally uttered.
‘For the Watch’.
The North Remembers – Best Scene
The showrunners had a difficult job with this episode because they had to balance multiple narratives – but rather than choose to definitely kill certain characters off- they left the sword dangling over their heads.
Note, the people who read the books (i.e. this particular JOE), now know just as much as those people who simply love the TV show. There’s no one in the Seven Kingdoms or Ireland that has a fecking clue about what’s coming next, apart from some lad named George R.R. Martin.
It’s 4 years since THAT cliffhanger George, 4 years! Not impressed.
As mentioned earlier, Stannis’ march on Winterfell was already dead in the ice and the realisation that ‘there’s not going to be a siege your grace‘ was the very definition of being up a Northern creek without a snowballs chance in hell.
This look says it all.
This battle was a massacre, perfectly described in this wonderful shot that depicted just how stark the situation was for the Lord of Dragonstone.
This time last year it was Stannis out-numbering Mance Rayder’s army.
How quickly things can change in Westeros, but I’ll say this, did anyone actually see Brienne deliver the fatal blow?
That scene cut straight to Ramsay delivering his own form of brutal justice so maybe, just maybe, we haven’t heard the last of Westeros’ best dad.
I’m probably clutching at straws a bit here though but no one knows.
Jamie and Myrcella shared a nice tender moment – so you knew that despair was imminent – while Theon Greyjoy reclaimed his manhood (in a metaphorical way at least) by coming to Sansa’s aid with Miranda.
Once again, nothing was definitely confirmed as Myrcella was poisoned and the two prisoners in Winterfell literally had to take a leap of faith to save their lives.
No bodies, no feast of crows and no certainties. Are we seeing a pattern develop here? Jon Snow fans will certainly hope so.
The rather brutal and cold incidents with Arya and Jon will be discussed later but the best scene this week was definitely Lena Headey’s fearless and powerful performance during Cersei’s public humiliation.
Justice and mercy were the key narrative themes this week and without saying a single word, Headey managed to convey pain, sorrow, anger and bitterness.
Seeing King’s Landing’s most fearless, cold and ruthless woman having her clothes, dignity and honour stripped away was incredibly memorable.
What’s important though is that she stumbled but didn’t fall. She’s a Lannister and despite the High Sparrow’s best attempts at clutching for what he really wanted – the truth about her and Jamie – Cersei remained unbowed, unbent and unbroken.
Ironic being that King’s Landing will need her because war with Dorne might be coming.
This shot is why Cersei is such a wonderful character. She’s going nowhere.
Valar Morghulis – Best Death
Arya was always going to exact her vengeance on Meryn Trant but she did so in one of the most gruesome and graphic deaths that the show has ever seen. A girl soon learned though that the many faced god doesn’t choose his victims via a simple thirst for justice.
It’s a shame that the youngest Stark doesn’t have an eye for detail though as she was literally blinded by bloodlust and paid the price.
And now for the 4,864,205 crown question that has plagued book readers for years. Is Jon dead? I have a very definite view on this but that’s for another article.
Again, 4 years!
Sub-category: Death count. Stannis’ wife, 5,000 soldiers loyal to Mr Baratheon, probably just the two Bolton warriors that Stannis took out, presumably Stannis himself thanks to Brienne, Miranda, one faceless man, Meryn Trant and the fate of Jon Snow rests in George R.R. Martin’s hands.
GoT X-Rated
Cersei’s very public penance for her sins left very little to the imagination but it’s this shot that stayed with me most.
Mother of Dragons – Best Beast Scene
If you ever find yourself in a strange land that’s filled with your enemies then a rule of thumb is to never leave your dragons side.
Poor Drogon, the little lad was so tired and he just needed a break. It’s a shame though that he flew Dany into the one place in Westeros where there’s more people that want her dead than Mereen.
Bad Drogon, bad!
Sticks and Stones and Swords – Best Insult
I did enjoy Dario’s half-compliment and half-insult aimed at Greyworm saying ‘he’s the toughest man with no balls that I’ve ever met‘.
This being said, there’s a clear winner this week and it’s a single spine-chilling word.
‘Shame’.
You Know Nothing – The WTF Moment
We all knew that winter and this was coming.
Stealing The Throne – This Week’s Best Character
For reasons previously mentioned it has to be Cersei. We’re also very curious about Frankenstein’s/The Mountain’s instructions that ‘he swore that he will not rest until the evil has been driven from the realm’.
The High Sparrow better look out.
From Wicklow to Westeros – Where did Aiden Gillen’s Irish accent land?
Chaos is a ladder and Littlefinger is its creator. Almost everything has been his doing but he somehow manages to get away with it, probably because of his lovely Irish brogue.
Despite his knowledge though, Season 5’s finale has yet again showed that only one man know’s what’s coming. George R.R Martin.
Winter is here and long may it stay.
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