In Wednesday’s Transfer Window, we take a look at all the football rumours, most of which can be linked to a Liverpool winger and sometimes striker.
By Conor Hogan
Ryan Babel is a 23-year-old Dutch winger and sometimes striker, who currently plays for Liverpool. Well I say play; he usually sits on the bench. But he is definitely contracted to the Anfield club. He’s not to be confused with Soviet writer Isaak Babel, who definitely never played for Liverpool, though he did write several plays. These included Maria and Sunset.
Also born in the Soviet Union was goalkeeper Igor Vladimirovich Akinfeev of CSKA Moscow. He also has never played for Liverpool, nor has been linked to them, as they already have the impeccably reliable Pepe Reina between the sticks. Akinfeev is apparently a target for Manchester United, however, as a potential replacement for their 50-year-old goalkeeper Edwin van der Sar from the Netherlands.

Isaak Babel and a horse
Also from the Netherlands is Liverpool winger and sometimes striker Ryan Babel. The Dutchman has a son called Riley, who he named after ex-Emmerdale actress and You’ve Been Framed host Lisa Riley, who once appeared in a television show called Fat Friends. Middlesbrough’s sometimes fat friend Mido has spoiled any chance of moving on loan to Turkish club Kayserispor, after sneaking into their training ground to inspect the facilities without first asking their permission.
Ryan Babel
Ryan Babel doesn’t need to ask permission off anybody for anything, such as asking permission to leave Liverpool. On the contrary, the Anfield Club seem desperate to offload him. They are currently considering selling him to German club Wolfsburg for £9million. For the same price, Steven McClaren’s Wolfsburg could purchase 60,000 Babels, i.e. the Patti Smith poetry collection of that name. Although, he might struggle to find that many copies of it on amazon.
There is a poem in the Radio Ethiopia section of Patti Smith’s Babel called Italy. A club who play in Italy are Fiorentina, a team currently trying to sign Sunderland’s Anton Ferdinand on loan with a view to a permanent move. Also from Italy are Champions League holders Inter Milan, who are interested in Liverpool’s Dirk Kuyt and Tottenham’s Mexican attacking midfielder Giovani dos Santos. Also from Mexico is Alejandro González Iñárritu, the 47-year-old film director responsible for the film Babel, not to be confused with Liverpool winger and sometimes striker Ryan Babel, who also has a side career as a rapper with friend and Liverpool target Royston Ricky Drenthe.
Babel rapping
Steve McClaren’s old club FC Twente could end up with Ryan Babel, as Livepool are considering offering the winger and sometimes striker as a makeweight in a swap deal for Costa Rican striker Bryan Ruiz. One club Babel definitely won’t be going to is his former team Ajax. The Amsterdam club look more likely to sell than buy at the moment, and have told Maarten Stekelenburg, Gregory van der Wiel and Luis Suarez that they would be willing to let them go if they received good offers. Many Premier League clubs are monitoring the situation.
Former Ajax manager Ronald Koeman claims to be on Randy Lerner’s shortlist for the vacant position at Aston Villa, just as he claimed to be on John Reid’s Celtics shortlist. He is unlikely to get the job, due to the fact that he is an appalling manager. He has the worst win/loss record of any boss in Valencia’s history (18%) and took an AZ Alkmaar side that ran away with the League in 2008/2009 to midtable obscurity last season.
In other news, Fulham are going to sign Eidur Gudjonsen or someone else, Everton are considering a £4million move for Sporting Lisbon’s Marat Izmailov, West Brom are after £3million rated Villa midfielder Steve Sidwell, Spurs are thinking of bidding for PSG’s Stephane Sessegnon, James Vaughan has been linked with a loan move to Blackpool, Edgar Davids could sign on a free for Crystal Palace, while Ryan Babel will appear on Ghanaian hip-hop artist Sway DaSafo’s next album.
SPL in a bucket
Motherwell have threatened Cardiff City with a winding-up order, for signing Craig Bellamy on-loan while still owing them £170,000 in transfer fees for Paul Quinn.
Celtic’s Darren O’Dea has signed on loan at Roy Keane’s Ipswich Town.
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