Enda will be missing from tonight’s leaders’ debate on TV3, saying he’ll be in Leitrim, of all places. We think otherwise. Here are five places he could well be.
By David Hawthorne
As we’re all already aware, Fine Gael leader Enda Kenny will not be in the TV3 studio tonight for a debate with Eamon Gilmore and Micheál Martin, citing comments made by veteran broadcaster Vincent Browne last summer as the reason for a no-show.
Browne stated last year that Kenny should “go into a dark room” with a bottle of whiskey and a gun.
So, Enda has opted to get on the campaign trail and attend a meeting in Carrick-on-Shannon tonight. But here at JOE Towers we think otherwise. Here are some of the events we think he could be showing up at, so make sure to keep your eyes peeled.
1. Ireland vs Wales at the Aviva Stadium
Enda may just decide to attend the Nations Cup match at the Aviva tonight to cheer on the boys in green. Watch out for a beautiful blonde head of hair on Sky Sports 2, because sure as hell he won’t be on TV3.
2. Extraterrestrial Culture Day
Kenny may get a late flight this afternoon and head to New Mexico to celebrate this annual event. A potential tourism booster if he decides to show is face at an event that celebrates and honours “all past, present and future extraterrestrial visitors in ways to enhance relationships among all citizens of the cosmos”.
Enda may be chumming with ET
3. The 12th Annual Old Phuket Festival
Enda might feel like indulging himself in a cultural experience of Phuket, Thailand, a regular haunt of backpackers where there’s an acceptance of taking it easy. This festival commenced today and runs until Wednesday. Stalls, dance troops and plenty of opportunity to lie on the beach while he waits to be crowned Taoiseach. Perhaps Enda decided, ‘Phuket, sounds like a laugh’.
4. Seth Green’s 37th Birthday Party
The actor best known for roles in Without A Paddle, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Austin Powers and as the voice of Chris Griffin from Family Guy will be having a knees-up I’m sure and perhaps Kenny will take the night off for a slice of cake and a different type of party.
Enda and Seth might kick it later on
5. Annual Laugh & Get Rich Day in Florida
One of the more likely spots for Enda tonight. The Annual Laugh & Get Rich Day is thought to result in improved morale that benefits your profit and loss statement.
Will Enda have the last laugh while his counterparts talk it out tonight? I wonder.
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