23/05 Today’s papers

The broadsheets are mixing it up, the tabloids are in full flight and the backpages have a wealth to choose from. Great day for a Sunday paper.

The Front Pages

The Sunday broadsheets are a mixed bag again this week, with no big story dominating the headlines.

 

The Sunday Tribune leads with an unfathomable story which has developed from a sex assault conviction in Kerry. When Danny Foley was convicted of sexual assault in Tralee last year dozens of his supporters showed up to shake his hand before he was taken down. Now it turns out that the victim of the attack has been subjected to a campaign of intimidation since the conviction. She has been getting threatening phone calls saying coffins have been bought for her and her young son who she lives with and her front door has been kicked in. Something very amiss with that whole drama.

 

The man who reckons the Pope is the anti-Christ and that us Catholics ‘breed like rats’ is to be given a life peerage in the House of Lords. That’s right, everyone’s favourate sectarian bigot, Ian Paisley Snr, is to be given a seat in the UK’s upper house thanks to his contribution to Northern Ireland politics. Yeah, cheers Ian. Couldn’t have had those 30 years of conflict without you buddy.

 

Also, the Sunday Tribune carries what is possibly the saddest story we have ever read here at JOE.ie on its page 3. Now, make sure you’re sitting down for this one – apparently, the Met Office reckons the good weather will be gone by tomorrow!

 

The Sunday Business Post has a good news story on its front page – apparently Google is set to boost its workforce in Ireland by 200. The internet giant is set to invest in shared services from its Dublin office. The best bit is that the jobs boost is just one of four major projects the IDA is set to announce in the coming weeks. We might get out of this yet lads.

 

Another story however, which by rights should be splashed across every newspaper on the planet, also appears on the front page of the Sunday Business Post. The HSE now reckons that 200 kids have died in its care in just the last 10 years. This comes on the back of a story from last week in which the bodies of 40 children were discovered in unmarked graves at the back of a care home. Ireland – never a good place to be an orphan.

 

Tales of the Tabs

 

The Irish Daily Star Sunday leads with the Ronangate story. Apparently, the Boyzone stars is set to ‘beg on his knees to get Yvonne back.’ How do they know this intimate information? Well, he told ‘pals’. Some pals they are!

 

The paper also carries a reference to an incredible sports-related story on page 8 about Everton and Ireland defender Shane Duffy. The poor young lad contested a free kick with goalkeeper Adrian Walsh and came off very much the worse.

 

The impact lacerated an artery going to his liver, he lost two-thirds of his blood and nearly died in the ambulance on the way to the hospital and again when he arrived. The Trap was said to be left grief stricken by the accident. He said, “In all my years in football I have never come across an injury like this.” Here’s wishing Shane a speedy recovery and a prompt return to football.

 

The Sunday World have an interesting slant on Ronangate. They’ve went for the pun-friendly angle of the family dogs – Yvonne was pictured playing with them yesterday while Ronan jetted off to perform. Apparently he’s still in the dog house. Heh, heh. If that wasn’t enough to make you run out and buy a copy, you also get a free Jedward poster!

 

The Irish Sunday Mirror meanwhile reckons it has the real inside track on Ronan’s split. The Mirror’s insiders are saying the total opposite of what the Sun’s people are coming out with. According to the Mirror, Ronan has been knocking boots with his lover Francine for seven months and that he’s ‘in love’. Christ Almighty.

 

Two more substantial stories are relegated to page two. One about how a team of Mossad agents tried to secure invites to the plant where Irish passports are produced a few weeks before murdering a Hammas chief while travelling on false documents – Irish passports among them. Another interesting one is the story of how the various Government departments have splashed €5m on ink cartridges in the last four years. That’s some going.

 

The Sports Pages

 

The big story in the sport section of most newspapers is of course, last night’s Champion’s League final. Even the broadsheets have managed to tear themselves away from their beloved rugby to report on the biggest match in any sport so far this year. The Sunday Tribune carries an account of the game by the multiculturally-monikered Miguel Delaney from Madrid. He reckons it might not have been much of a game from the point of view of a neutral – but it more than demonstrated Jose’s brilliance.

 

The Irish Daily Star Sunday goes with ‘Mour Magic – Jose signs off in style at Inter’. They reckon a Champion’s League win is the perfect parting gift from Jose before he heads off to take up the poison chalice that is the Real Madrid top job. The paper also highlights the story of Shane Duffy and his near-death horror injury suffered while on Ireland duty. The Trap was very emotional as he discussed how Duffy lost two-thirds of his blood when his liver was torn in a challenge during a friendly. He also backed the Everton man to become a key player for Ireland once he recovers.

 

The Sunday World has some tasty transfer news this week – it reckons that Martin O’Neill is going to turn Aston Villa green this summer by doing a triple swoop (sounds dangerous) on Stephen Ireland, Robbie Keane and Kevin Doyle. City are apparently going to play ball – offering £30m plus Ireland in exchange for Milner. Bargain!

 

The Sunday Mirror leads with what has turned into one of the biggest pay-days in world football – the Championship play-off. Blackpool beat Cardiff City 3-2 to land a place in the Premiership which is expected to reap a €100m windfall for the seaside club. That’s a nice chunk of change in any man’s language.