Uruguay took on the Netherlands in the semi-final that nobody predicted. Nobody at all. And if you say that you predicted it, then you’re a bloody liar.
In the end Holland won. Just.
Uruguay 2-3 Holland
With Conor Hogan
Wrap up: Holland continued to play unattractive football, but in the end they certainly deserved to win. They were comfortably 3-1 ahead, and the second Uruguay goal probably flattered the South Americans. Uruguay might feel slightly hard-done, however, as Van Persie was certainly offside for the second Holland goal. We were treated to two fantastic goals by Van Bronckhorst and Forlan, and five goals, so it would be churlish to complain that it wasn’t a particularly good match. But it wasn’t a particularly good match, especially for a World Cup semi-final.
Thanks very much for joining us for the first of our two semi-final matchtrackers.
Hope you enjoyed it.
Goodbye.
“They are not a team you could fall in love,” says Eamon Dunphy, “Will Spain or Germany have the resilience to get kicked by this Holland team, and still get up and keep playing?” Giles adds, “They don’t have the players to be as creative or constructive as they used to be. But they are effective.”
Tremendous finish to the match. Uruguay showed a lot of fighting spirit in the final few minutes, and had a couple of chances. After being in complete control, Holland were hanging on in the last few seconds, and were happy to hear the final whistle.
Full time
The players thought that the whistle was blown for full-time, but it was a free-kick to Holland. Dirty dirty Mark Van Bommel was booked for complaining, and not for kicking the crap out of people earlier in the match.
Surely too late. A free-kick is played into Maxi Pereira, who slots the ball home. Only about a minute left.
Goal Uruguay
Uruguay seemed to have a chance, but about four of their players were offside. Robben is substituted. On comes hot prospect Elia.
“The next person that says Ireland can’t compete because of our size,” says Billy from Kildare, “I’m going to spit in their face. We have a million more people than Uruguay and a much bigger selection worldwide. And they’ve made the semi-final, and won the World Cup before.” You’re absolutely right Billy. How big is the Irish diaspora meant to be? Eighty million? Van Der Vaart shoots straight at Muslera.
Player of the World Cup Diego Forlan is coming off, and Fernandez is coming on. Even though Uruguay are going out, it is still a hell of an achievement to get to the semi-finals for such a tiny country. I hope that didn’t sound patronising.
Abreu, who scored that amazingly confident penalty in Uruguay’s shoot-out win against Ghana, has come off the bench to replace Pereira. The Dutch are all over them at the moment. You could see them getting one or two more.
“The Dutch look like they’re starting to improve. This game might go the distance, and with Uruguay having already competed in a penalty shootout you’d have to give them the edge if it goes that far. I Hope Holland go through, the rivalry between them and Germany is crazy!! and even if Germany don’t make it, a Spain v Holland final wouldn’t be half bad either!” wrote Frank McCann a couple of minutes ago. Two goals in four minutes have completely changed this game. Holland are definitely going through now.
Kuyt crosses the ball into Arjen Robben, who heads it home perfectly. Game, set and match. Uruguay shall not pass go. They shall not collect $200.
Goal Holland
Sneijder shoots from outside the box, and it deflects off a Uruguayan and possibly Van Persie (who looked offside). The goalkeeper can’t keep it out. Sneijder has been given the goal. That is his fifth of the tournament. Did anyone suspect him to be so prolific?
Goal Holland
Free-kick from out-side the box in Diego Forlan territory. He has a great shot that Stekelenburg has to get down low to save. The corner is cleared, and Arevalo blazes over from about 25 yards. At the other end, a long ball goes to Van Persie who passes to Van Der Vaart. His shot from six yards is brilliantly saved by Muslera, while Robben shoots high and wide from a rebound. Best chance of the game, apart from the goals, which weren’t great chances.
Sneijder has a shot from outside the box that is a contender for worst of the tournament. It actually goes 100% sideways. “Very un-Wesley Sneijder,” says George Hamilton.
“Here’s to hoping Van Bommel gets his own legs broken,” says Eddie from Oranbeag. Indeed. Does dirty dirty Mark Van Bommel actually do anything apart from fouling? And does he have some sort of spell over refs, so that they don’t book him.
Uruguay have a corner, which Stekelenburg punches away. Robben tries to run past Arevalo in the box, but the Uruguayan defender stands strong and puts the ball out for a corner. Robben crosses the ball in from the corner, but nothing comes of it, and Uruguay get a free-out.
Uruguay are the second smallest country in this year’s World Cup population-wise, with a population of only 3.3 million. The smallest was tiny Slovenia, which has only 2 million. Amazingly for a country of its size, Uruguay has won two World Cups, in 1930 and 1950.
So far in the second half, Uruguay have been the better team. The Dutch defending has been shocking. Absolutely shocking.
Van Der Vaart tries to play the ball into the box, but his pass is poor and it gets blocked. Boulahrouz then plays a terrible back-pass, which almost plays Cavani. The Dutch keeper blocks it, and Pereira almost lobs him, but Van Bronckhorst clears it off the line.
Second half kicks off. Attacking substitution for the Netherlands. Van Der Vaart comes on for De Zeeuw, who got a smack in the face in the first half. I always buy Van Der Vaart in Football Manager, but it is possible to say that he’s never quite fullfilled his potential in real life, although he was decent for Hamburg and Ajax.
“We’re looking at a real contest,” says Eamon Dunphy. Uruguay look like they could cause an upset here, as long as Diego Forlan exists. Giovanni Von Bronkhorst’s wonderstrike gave Holland the lead but they weren’t able to create enough chances, and let Uruguay come back into the game. Holland were the better team in the first half, but not by a lot. I wouldn’t be surprised if it went to extra-time, perhaps penalties.
2020:
A new George Hook ad for Sky. Oh joy!
Half time
Holland looked to be in control until Forlan’s shot from nowhere. Sneijder tries to play the ball in to Kuyt, but he is given offside. Replays showed he was on, but he wouldn’t have done anything with it.
Forlan shoots from a free-kick from about 30 yards, but this time Stekelenburg gathers it comfortably.
The best player of the World Cup so far, Diego Forlan, takes a shot from outside the box that goes right over the goalkeeper. Great shot, Stekelenburg could’ve done better possibly. That is Forlan’s fourth World Cup goal from outside the box.
Goal Uruguay
Obligatory Vuvuzela review: About as good as it gets (which still isn’t very good). Sometimes they have a genuine rhythm in this match, and aren’t quite as repetitive as some games.
So far the Netherlands have been the better team and the statistics reflect this. They have had nearly 60% of the ball, and have had three times as many shots on target than the Uruguayans. Alvaro Pereira had a shot from outside the box that went harmlessly into Stekelenburg’s hands.
Caceres tried a rather extravagant over-head kick clearance, and connects full force with De Zeeuw’s chin. He rightfully gets booked. They showed a replay of the Van Bronkhorst goal yet again. Houghton blames the goalie, but you couldn’t. It’s just too damn good. Caceres makes a great tackle on Robben to deny him a goalscoring opportunity. Cavani just dived at the other end to try and win a penalty.
“I really doubt either of these teams will win the World Cup,” writes Frank McCann. “I’m expecting Holland vs. Germany on Sunday, and the German’s should beat either of these two. I’m hoping there are no big name suspensions tonight! I don’t know if you allow plugging on this, but I wrote up a blog piece on frankiemccann.blogspot.com.” Plug away Frank.
Yellow card for Maxi Pereira, after a tackle on Arjen Robben that the Bayern Munich man made an absolute meal of. Robben took the free-kick from the side of the pitch, but couldn’t get it past the first man, who was Pereira.
Astonishing strike by Geovanni Van Bronkhorst. He took a shot from nearly 30 yards in the corner of the pitch, and it absolutely flew into the top corner. Amazing goal. The best of the World Cup possibly.
Goal Holland
Cavani plays a pass to Diego Forlan, but this time the latter is offside. So far the match has belied these two teams defensive reputations. Sneijder had a shot blocked just a minute ago that appeared like it could have troubled the Uruguayan keeper.
Forlan tries to play in Cavani, but he doesn’t read the Atletico Madrid man’s intention. Just after that Cavani was caught offside from a Forlan pass. Cavani is no Luis Suarez.
George Hamilton mistakenly says that Uruguay and Holland have only met twice in football history. In fact, they’ve met four times. Uruguay winning three, Holland’s only win coming in the already mentioned match from ’74. Kuyt crosses in for Robben, but Muslera gathers the ball.
“Is it just me or has Diego Forlan been the player of the tournament?†asks Jim from Kerry. It isn’t just you Jim, he’s been absolutely outstanding, and has been involved in almost every good move Uruguay have made. Pereira tries his luck from the halfway-line. Just over.
First chance to the Netherlands. Muslera punched it, the ball went to Kuyt just inside the box, but the Liverpool man blazed the ball a mile over the bar.
Game kicks off. First tackle in anger by dirty dirty Mark Van Bommel. A clean tackle this time though. Holland are currently in the midst of 24 match unbeaten run.
Surprisingly, Didi Hamman has gone for Uruguay to win. Bill was slightly incredulous; “Why would you say that?” The only way he could think Uruguay would win tonight is if he had travelled back from the future in a time machine. Giles goes for Holland, Dunphy yet again sits on the fence.
If you want to check out a great World Cup semi-final from the past, you could do worse than check out this footage from the magnificent Germany v France match from 1982.
They were talking about dirty dirty Mark Van Bommel in the RTE studio. Dunphy mistakenly believed that if Van Bommel had gotten booked in the Brazil match that he would’ve been suspended. Incredibly, however, Van Bommel hasn’t got a single yellow card yet in the tournament.
RTE have Giles, Dunphy, and Didi Hamman in the studio. I would’ve thought it would make more sense to have Hamman in the studio for the Germany semi-final, assuming Brady gets the final, and Ronnie Whelan gets the other semi.
These two teams have met only once before in the World Cup. That was in a group game in ’74, when Holland won 2-0. That game is regarded as the debut of total football. That year Holland lost the final to Germany. Could that happen in this World Cup too? Interestingly, Diego Forlan’s father, Pablo, played as a defender for Uruguay in that match in ’74.
The referee for tonight’s clash, Ravshan Irmatov (below), is the youngest ref in the World Cup at only 32 years of age. He was rated the best official in Asia in 2008 and 2009. He’s also the youngest man to ref a World Cup sem-final since 1934.
The fact that England’s Howard Webb hasn’t been given a semi-final suggests that he may get to officiate the final itself. Then again he may get the third-place-play-off, which nobody cares about.
1834:
The teams:
Uruguay: 1-Fernando Muslera; 3-Diego Godin, 6-Mauricio Victorino, 5-Walter Gargano, 16-Maximiliano Pereira, 22-Martin Caceres, 15-Diego Perez, 11-Alvaro Pereira, 17-Egidio Arevalo, 7-Edinson Cavani, 10-Diego Forlan.
Netherlands: 1-Maarten Stekelenburg; 12-Khalid Boulahrouz, 3-John Heitinga, 4-Joris Mathijsen, 5-Giovanni van Bronckhorst; 7-Dirk Kuyt, 6-Mark van Bommel, 10-Wesley Sneijder, 14-Demy de Zeeuw, 11-Arjen Robben; 9-Robin van Persie.
Referee: Ravshan Irmatov (Uzbekistan)
The match will be played at the newly-constructed Green Point Stadium in Cape Town. Below is a picture of it’s interior, if stadiums are what you’re into.
I just enjoyed a salad. I’m trying to eat healthier. Interesting statistic: Of the four goals that Diego Forlan has scored in the World Cup, three of them have come from outside the box. Which means that he’s good at shooting from outside the box, I suppose.
1720:
In other news related to this match; Holland’s Wesley Sneijder has been linked to Man United in a £25m move. And here was me thinking they were broke. He is one of the favourites to win the Ballon D’or and has been Holland’s best player in this World Cup by some distance, so £25m sounds cheap at the price, especially as he only joined Internazionale last season. To read more on this story click the hyperlink.
Speaking of Luis Suarez, feel free to send in your opinions about his red card against Ghana to shout@joe.ie. Is he a cheat? Is he a hero? Would 99% of footballers have done the same? Would you have done the same? Was he right to gloat about it? Did the punishment fit the crime? Etc. . .
Uruguay’s Diego Lugano is expected to miss tonight’s semi-final with an injured knee. Nicolas Lodeiro will definitely miss out as he has a broken foot. Nigel De Jong and Gregory Van der Wiel are suspended for Holland, while Jorge Fucile and Luis Suarez are suspended for Uruguay.
Here is a picture of Paul the Octopus.
The winners of tonight’s match will definitely face Spain in the final it’s been confirmed, after Paul ‘the Psychic’ Octopus predicted a German loss. For more on this amazing story click on the hyperlink.
News related to tonight’s match: Uruguay talisman and only world class player, Diego Forlan, has ruled himself out of a move to next year’s Champions League winners Tottenham Hotspur. The fool!
Paddy Power predicts that it will end up being a 3-1 victory for the Dutch. Here is their blog and their humorous take on how it’s gonna go down.
